Embrace Life

Superbowl With Charleston Beer Exchange

CBX has all of your Superbowl beer needs covered!

Superbowl Celebration Growler Event (2/6-2/7)
Starting Saturday at opening they'll be filling growlers of Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale for $8!  They don't know how long this will last, but they have a good bit and it should be available all day Saturday and Superbowl Sunday.  Swing by and fill up a growler or two of Celebration!

New in Bottles/Back in Stock
Boulder Mojo Risin' Double IPA
Great Divide Saint Bridget's Porter
Highland 2008 Imperial Black Mocha Stout
Hoppin' Frog Mean Manalishi Double IPA
Hoppin' Frog Silk Porter
Hoppin Frog BORIS the Crusher Imperial Stout
New Belgium Ranger IPA
Southern Tier Unearthly IPA
Sweetwater Happy Ending

Charleston Brewvival (2/27)
Don't forget to get your tickets for their exciting craft beer festival coming up February 27th in North Charleston!  Go to CharlestonBrewvival.com for all the info.  The brewery/beer list keeps getting better and better!  Please follow Brewvival on Facebook and Twitter for real-time news and updates!

Cheers!

The Charleston Beer Exchange
14 Exchange St.
Charleston, SC 29401
843.577.5446
www.thecharlestonbeerexchange.com

Whatever, Anything, You Decide

We don't understand Women: Their "Whatever" "Anything" OR "You Decide"

1 . (Whatever)

Men: What should we have for dinner?
Women: Whatever..
Men: Why don't we have Mexican?
Women: No not Mexican, the last time i got pimples on my face
Men: Alright, why don't we have Szechwan cuisine
Women: Yesterday we ate Szechwan, today too?
Men: Hmm..... I suggest we have seafood
Women: Seafood is not good, I got diarrhea
Men: Then what do you suggest?
Women : Whatever..

2. (Anything)

Men: So what should we do now?
Women: Anything
Men: How about watching a movie? It's been a long time
Women: Watching movie is no good, it's a waste of time
Men: How about we go for bowling, or some exercises?
Women: Exercise on such a hot day?
Men: Then find a cafe and have a drink
Women: I am off caffeine
Men: Then what do you suggest?
Women: Anything

3. (You decide)

Men: Then do we just go home?
Women: You decide
Men: Let's take the bus, I will accompany you
Women: The bus is dirty and crowded.
Men: OK; we will take a cab
Women: Not worth it... for such a short distance
Men: All right, then we can walk. We can enjoy the weather
Women: I am hungry, can't walk.
Men: Then what do you suggest?
Women: You decide
Men: Let's have dinner first?
Women: Whatever...
Men: What shall we eat?
Women: Anything..

Government Cat

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.

The first man was an Engineer,
the second man was an Accountant,
the third man was a Chemist, and
the fourth man was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called his cat, "T-square, do your stuff."

T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and
promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.

Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and
said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff."

Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies.
He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies.

Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and
said, "Measure, do your stuff."

Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a
10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without
spilling a drop

into the glass.

Everyone agreed that was pretty good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, "What
can your cat do?"

The Government Employee called his cat and said, "CoffeeBreak, do your stuff."

Coffee Break jumped to his feet.......

ate the cookies........

drank the milk........

shat on the paper.......

screwed the other three cats........

claimed he injured his back while doing so.......

filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions.......

put in for Workers Compensation...............and

went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............

AND THAT, MY FRIEND IS WHY EVERYONE WANTS TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT!!

The Monkey and the Hat-Seller

Cartoon of the Decade

Before You Complain...

Today before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone who's crying out to God for a companion.

Today before you complain about life - Think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before you complain about your children - Think of someone who desires children but they're barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house someone didn't clean or sweep - Think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job. Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another - Remember that not one of us is without sin and we all answer to one God

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on your face and thank God you're alive and still around.

2010 Census

In March of 2010, census forms will be delivered to every residence in the United States and Puerto Rico.  When you receive yours, just answer the 10 short questions and then mail the form back in the postage-paid envelope provided.  If you don’t mail the form back, you may receive a visit from a census taker, who will ask you the questions from the form.  A census taker must follow-up in person with every address that doesn’t mail back the form in order to obtain the responses.

The Census is Safe

• The 2010 Census will ask for name, gender, age, race, ethnicity, relationship, and whether you own or rent your home – just 10 simple questions that will take about 10 minutes to answer.
• The Census Bureau safeguards all census responses to the highest security standards available.
• Your answers are protected by law and are not shared with anyone. The census taker who collects your information is sworn for life to protect your data under Federal Law Title 13.  Those who violate the oath face criminal penalties.  Under federal law, the penalty for unlawful disclosure is a fine of up to $250,000 or imprisonment for up to 5 years, or both.

When Census Takers will be Going Door-to-Door

• From April to July 2010, the Census Bureau will knock on the door of every household that does not mail back a completed 2010 Census form.
• It’s critical that you take just 10 minutes to fill out and mail back your form rather than wait for a census worker to show up on your doorstep. About $85 million in taxpayer dollars are saved for every one percent increase in mail response.
• The Census Bureau must get a census form to – and a completed form back from – every residence in the United States.  That’s more than 130 million addresses. This is why the census is the largest domestic mobilization our nation undertakes.

How to Identify a Census Taker
If a U.S. Census Bureau employee knocks on your door, here are some recognition tips to assure the validity of the employee:

• The census taker must present an ID badge that contains a Department of Commerce watermark and expiration date.  The census taker may also be carrying a bag with a Census Bureau logo.
• The census taker will provide you with supervisor contact information and/or the Local Census Office phone number for verification, if asked.
• The census taker will ONLY ask you the questions that appear on the census form.

What the 2010 Census DOES NOT Ask

• 2010 Census takers will not ask you for your social security number, bank account number, or credit card number.
• 2010 Census takers also never solicit for donations and will never contact you by e-mail.

For more information about the upcoming 2010 Census visit www.2010census.gov.

 

iPAD - tech solution for the busy office girl

Doctor Dave

Doctor Dave had slept with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal were overwhelming. But every now and then he'd hear an internal reassuring voice in his head that said: "Dave, don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to sleep with one of their patients and you won't be the last. And you're single. Just let it go." But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality. Whispering.....    Dave.......... Dave ............. Dave........ Dave........         Dave……..        ............you're a vet.